eating…it’s shitting in reverse.

eating ….it’s shitting in reverse…

or as my funny little friend tony says ” food…it’s just shit waiting to happen”.

when you stand right back and look,it’s quite revolting..people chomping away..some with the mouths open..like front loading washing machines…

disgusting…

however…restaurants are great,aren’t they?!…

there’s just something about a clean white linen dinner table that levels and elevates people for them to become fully available to each other.

it’s nice…the company..the atmosphere..a good interior…soft lighting…getting a little bit high on the wine…

if only they’d get rid of the food . the grub just gets in the way on several levels.

for one thing it dampens the alcohols full effect ,

and you’re no sooner at the table getting into the swing of conversation,when the waiter comes and kills everything by making you read a really dull book called ‘menu’

food is a cockblocker.

yes yes..i obviously understand the whole nutrition thing.

i get it together too..

starting the day with a pint of warm water …

blueberry juice…

endless life giving pills

banana/all bran with rice milk ,and only then do i get into endless mugs of earl grey tea.

i do the stretch and breathing exercises…so i’m not in denial of health or whatever…

but i do wish this world would  re-evalute the whole idea of food in our lives.

in my dreams we wouldn’t eat in public.

if we needed to do it away from home,there would be cubicles…just like a toilet..

in restaurants there would be three soundproof cubicles..

one for people to talk on mobile phones…

another for shitting…

and another for eating…

that way everyone would return to their tables fully available for that most lovely of things…conversation.

no chomping…no menus…no dirty steaming plates…

just lovely gleaming glassware for potent cocktails to lubricate peoples minds at the white linen round table.

it also irks me how food somehow gathers status…

oysters which in their original capacity were peasant food,are now the culinary accessory of the flash city boy ..

how did that happen?!

the fattiest things like fois gras are expensive,where a bowl of all bran which scrapes the walls of intestines clean[nice!] ,costs mere pennies.

and books!..the biggest selling books this year are about flipping cocking food….yaawwwwwwn.

i promise you, patti smith’s book ‘just kids’ is a far better read than anything on buggery cookery.

she often went days without food so she could buy art materials for robert maplethorpe…gotta love her!

i have found that food has made me a total hypocrite too.

sometimes when i get run down i take this notion of eating steak and spinach for maybe a month .

i can’t tell if this is a good idea or just cultures effect upon me.

something in my childhood grooming has left this voice in my head that whispers ‘too much vegetarianism will leave the body weak’…

so i’m all over the place with this…but that’s food for you.

the point i’m making is there’s just too much time,money or emphasis on food.

chomp chew burp chew chomp chomp chomp……burrrrrp.

i hope you like the picture of me and billy fields in the kitchen…

food and eating seem okay here…it’s not public…

the reason i like the kitchen has little to do with food…

it’s a place to argue,laugh and make earl grey tea.

most importantly i like the echoey sound …so i can sing and play my little guitar and sound good.

..and the video clip is of a song i wrote sitting exactly there,where others would chop onions.